The two of them together are a happy place. It's the only time laughing and smiling don't feel like a betrayal.
There are moments when I truly cannot fathom the loss of Taylor. She has been gone over fifty days. This afternoon it was as if the accident occurred all over again. All the denial, all the questions, pound relentlessly against me driving me into the heart of a whirlpool of grief. Joey's strength seems to find me. He offers his hand or his shoulder until the crying ceases. Then, he is there for his boy, talking football and giving him trouble. We would have texted her pictures of the boys at dinner tonight. We would have let her help us make fun of our very intelligent young man who aces Pre AP Chem tests. She would have called him a freak and commented, "Who does that!?" secretly being just as proud as Joey and I.
I know its selfish to want her here - but I do.
My boys are good for me - but I miss the world that held my daughter.